What a fucking waste of an outfit
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
