brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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