So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
