i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
