week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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