we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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