thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Randomize
