i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
She bit a glass in half.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
