im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
