i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
