i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
