He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
