you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
