Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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