Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
