Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
