After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
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