How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
well you can't waste a boner
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
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