you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
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