Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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