my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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