Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
