Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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