I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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