wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
i believe in u and ur pee
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
