Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
