when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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