Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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