So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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