my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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