Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize