and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Randomize
