Christians are straight up FREAKS
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize
