You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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