Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
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