Your tits are I can't wait for
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
just found out that she named her cat after me.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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