did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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