During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
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