You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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