Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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