3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
