i barfeds in our rink
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
