WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Randomize
