u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Randomize
