"it" just moved
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
My dick has a subreddit
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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