please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
