Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I smell like Dick and happiness
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