I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
