I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Randomize