There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I just gargled with NyQuil
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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