Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
